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Panthers' Rock Coping with His Mom's Death

October 15, 2006

Charles Chandler

Charlotte Observer

Mike Minter isn't used to fighting off tears during a football game.

But it's happening frequently this season as he adjusts to life without his mother, Florida, who died Aug. 10 of a sudden illness. She was 59.
"I'm not an emotional guy," said Minter, the Carolina Panthers' starting free safety. "But I've got to stop myself from crying every time I step on the football field. She's on my mind the whole time."

When he intercepted a pass by Cleveland quarterback Charlie Frye last Sunday with two minutes remaining to secure a 20-12 win, he said he thought to himself: "Mom, that's for you. Hopefully, there are more to come."

Minter is a rock of a man not only on the Panthers' defense, but for the entire organization. He has started more games (130) than any player in team history. His current streak of 83 consecutive starts also is a team record. His strong character and natural leadership skills have been staples of his 10-year NFL career.

Win or lose, he has faithfully and respectfully answered reporters' questions after every game - from miserable times like the Panthers' 1-15 season in 2001 to the glorious Super Bowl run in 2003.

He is a husband and father of four children. He coaches youth sports, speaks to churches as an aspiring pastor, and is widely known for his community service. He has a thriving career in real estate development.

Minter credits one person for making him the man he is today: Florida Maye Minter.

"She was everything," he said.

Family ties

Minter's mother raised him, his brother and two sisters in Lawton, Okla., as a single mom. She endured the early deaths of two husbands.

Mike might never have been born if her first husband hadn't died of complications from gunshot wounds. She later married Mike's father, who died of heart problems when Mike was 8 months old.

Florida Minter worked as a hairdresser.

"We were never on welfare," said Mike. "We never got government assistance. I think that's where we get our toughness. We don't let too much stuff get us down."

Minter said he developed his consistent temperament because his mother taught her children - and modeled for them - to be the same person every day no matter the circumstances.

It was from her, he said, that he learned to care for others. She had 13 siblings and frequently gave from what little money she had to help them. She took meals to family members who didn't have food and provided a place to stay for those without a home.

Mike, his sister Rosalind Beaty and his brother William Johnson said their mom was extremely affectionate and loved to have fun with them.

Rosalind recalled Mike dressing up in a cowboy hat and boots to entertain and dance for his mom when he was a young boy.

Florida affirmed him from an early age, predicting he'd be successful and calling him "my little $6 million man."

Now, at age 32, Minter has earned about three times that much money in his NFL career.

"It's like she prophesied over me," he said.

Once he made the NFL, she pulled for Mike and the Panthers to win a Super Bowl. They talked by phone several times a week.

"There wasn't a time that went by when she didn't tell me she was proud of me," he said.

Sudden change

Minter planned to bring his mother to live with him before this football season started. He had a downstairs suite in his three-story house in Kannapolis already prepared.

He and his sister wanted her here so she could enjoy the hair salon near Concord Mills they were opening in her honor, with proceeds going to fund a ministry to help single moms.

When her move was temporarily delayed in July, Mike said he believes God led him to take his two sons to visit her in Lawton. The timing was unusual because only two weeks remained before he and the Panthers had to report to training camp in Spartanburg.

"That's the busiest time for a player, right before you go to camp," he said. "But I was like, `Forget it, I'm going.' "

She seemed to be in good health. He said he loved seeing his sons spend time with her, but his favorite moment of the trip came when he found her sleeping on a couch.

"I didn't want to wake her up," he said. "I was just sitting there looking at her, like, `Thank you for everything.' I just had a moment to reflect on everything in my life as I looked at her."

Less than a month later, Minter was at training camp when his dormitory phone rang. He had missed practice that day because he was nauseated.

His mother had breathing problems and was hospitalized.

Later that day, her condition worsened and he was summoned to Lawton.

"Anytime you get a call like that, you're going to be worried and concerned," said Panthers chaplain Mike Bunkley, who was with Minter at the time. "Physically, you could see it all over him."

Minter never saw his mother conscious again.

Doctors told the family she had diabetes - something none of them knew - and was also suffering from low blood pressure and kidney failure.

Less than 24 hours after his arrival, Minter was in his mother's hospital room when her heart monitor flat-lined.

"Everything went to zero," he said. "From that point on, life has not been real."

Moving on

Panthers coach John Fox left training camp for a day to fly on a private plane to the funeral with team owner Jerry Richardson, team president Mark Richardson, general manager Marty Hurney, defensive end Mike Rucker, director of player development Donnie Shell and Bunkley.

Their presence made a lasting impression on Minter.

"It filled my heart up at a time when I really needed it," he said. "What it showed is football is not just a business and it's not just about winning. It's really about life. We genuinely care about one another."

After the funeral, Florida Minter's body was taken to her gravesite in a carriage pulled by six white horses, just as she had requested for years.

Mike said she got the idea from one of her favorite movies, "Imitation Of Life."

More than two months after his mother's death, Minter's pain is still piercing.

"It's been harder than I ever would've thought," he said. "It's just so tough to deal with the fact that she's not here."

Teammates have showered him with compassion.

"For most of us, we're mama's boys," said cornerback Ken Lucas. "I don't even know if I would be able to play any more if my mama was to die."

Bunkley is glad Minter hasn't tried to bottle up his feelings.

"People grieve in different ways," said Bunkley. "What I've felt from Mike all along is he has been healthy with it."

Minter has joined others in the Panthers family in rallying around Bunkley, who found out two days after returning from Florida Minter's funeral that his own mother had been diagnosed with a rare form of cancer located behind her nose, near the base of her brain.

"They've lifted up my arms and my family in their prayers and their cares," said Bunkley, who received the good news last Monday that the size of Cladie Bunkley's tumor had decreased by 50 percent.

Minter said he hopes the story of his loss will encourage people not to take their loved ones for granted.

Minter said when he plays today's game in Baltimore against the Ravens - just as he's done every game this season - he'll be wearing a T-shirt under his jersey bearing a picture of his mother.

Printed below her photo are the words "My Inspiration."